January - Operation Cat Rescue

Sunday, 1st January

The new year began but nothing really changed from yesterday. From six in the morning everyone was fussing about going to watch the sunrise. At seven we left the condo and went to Yeonggeumjeong. The car park was already rammed. After we somehow managed to squeeze the car in we found a decent spot with a good view. At 7.20 there was still no sign of the sun. Then my uncle suddenly yelled ‘There it is!’ but it wasn’t the sun. It was the light on a squid-fishing boat.

Around 7.40 the sun finally started to haul itself out of the sea. Hee-jeong and I held hands and looked at each other and laughed.

We took a few quick souvenir photos then got straight back into the cars for Seoul. Aunt Jeong-su had put the fear of God into us. If we dawdled we’d spend hours just getting out through Misiryeong Tunnel. By the time we were speeding towards the tunnel the sun was already high over our heads. We got through Misiryeong without any trouble and had breakfast at the dried pollack village in Yongdae-ri. This time nobody asked for soju. With the exception of my dad the other dads go back to work tomorrow. When you remember you’ve got a job alcohol must taste like nothing.

Thanks to my uncle we didn’t hang about and left quickly. Result. No traffic. And we got back to Seoul safely.

Monday, 2nd January

Mum went to work, Dad wrote in his workshop and I made my resolutions for the year.

- New Year’s Resolutions for Mr Heo Byeok -

1. Be loyal to Hee-jeong!
2. Don’t run on the stairs.
3. Don’t eat too fast.
4. Stand up straight.
5. After reading put books back on Dad’s bookshelf.
6. Don’t abandon a book halfway. Finish it.
7. Cycle carefully.
8. Clean Baduk’s kennel properly.
9. Help people in trouble when I see them.
10. Listen to my parents. Especially Mum.
11. As for Dad. Listen but filter what he says.
12. Work seriously at school.
13. Study a bit of music and art.

Tuesday, 3rd January

Mum saw my New Year’s Resolutions and praised me. She found No. 10 listen especially to Mum very cute. And No. 11 filter what Dad says also very cute.

She told Dad to make one too. Dad resisted ‘What am I a child?’ He said he’d already submitted his sabbatical plan and that was enough. The more Dad lives like a carefree grasshopper the more solid his confidence becomes.

Mum insisted ‘That was that. Now you need New Year’s Resolutions as well.’ Dad just laughed ‘Alright alright.’ Mum said if he didn’t write one she would do it for him. Dad agreed calmly. So Mum decided this.

- New Year’s Resolutions for Heo Su-jeong -

1. If you eat like an animal you’ll end up a pig.
2. If you don’t brush your teeth after eating you’ll end up with dentures.
3. If you spend blindly you’ll end up a tramp.
4. If you don’t listen to your wife you’ll end up single.

Mum printed it out and put it up in Dad’s workshop and in the bedroom. Dad looks worried. Especially about No. 4. It seems to be physically shaking him.

Wednesday, 4th January

Hee-jeong and I went to volunteer at a nursery run by the district office. During the holidays we decided we’d go every Wednesday from 9 a.m. to 1 p.m. In truth volunteering just means helping the teachers gather the little ones, helping them eat their snacks, helping them play, tidying the shoe cubbies they trash, helping with lunch, helping with cleaning and wiping filthy windows, shovelling yesterday’s snow and that’s that. Ow. My back. Hee-jeong got properly exhausted after going yesterday. Alert.

Thursday, 5th January

This morning I went to see Hee-jeong. She’d slept well and she didn’t look as worrying as I’d feared. Her mum made us hot cocoa and we drank it together before I went home.

When I got back Baduk had vanished. The gate was firmly shut and there was no trace of him anywhere. When I asked Dad he said he didn’t know either. He’d been in the workshop all morning. Apart from the gate there was nowhere Baduk could possibly have gone out. I turned into Sherlock Holmes and searched the entire house. Nothing had changed. Only one thing bothered me. Baduk’s food bowl had disappeared as well. When I pointed it out Dad said we might have had a dog thief. At that my legs gave way and I dropped onto the floor.

Dad and I wandered around the neighbourhood for over an hour and found no sign of Baduk. I cried so much my eyes were swollen. Dad offered to buy me another dog but it didn’t comfort me. Baduk is not replaceable.

Exhausted we opened the gate and Baduk came running towards me from the yard tail wagging. Dad and I stared at each other stunned.

‘Baduk where have you been?’

Woof. Woof. Woof.

I hugged him delirious with relief but Baduk tried to wriggle free tugging at my trousers with his mouth. Then he ran towards the back of the house. He turned around and barked as if calling us. Dad and I realised something was off and followed him. Under the back wall Baduk had slipped through a small hole. The little criminal had dug himself a secret exit without telling us. He wasn’t secretly sleeping outside at night was he?

Baduk kept barking on the other side of the wall. We couldn’t climb over so we ran round through the gate and chased after him. He stopped in front of a drain cover and barked signalling us to come closer.

Inside a mother cat and her three kittens half dead with exhaustion were huddled together. Dad took off his coat and gently wrapped the kittens. The mother growled for a moment but Baduk barked at her and she calmed down. I did what Dad did and wrapped the mother cat in my coat. Baduk meanwhile retrieved his bowl that had fallen into the drain. We rushed home.

Dad found the cleanest cardboard box in the storeroom cut an opening and set up a warm blanket inside. We washed the mother and the kittens in lukewarm water then dried them with a hairdryer. I warmed four small saucers of kitten milk just right. After handing the cats over to us Baduk strolled around the living room and the upstairs bedrooms as if touring a museum. Since he normally lives outside in the yard he’d never been in the house. I hope he didn’t feel betrayed when he discovered the living room’s comfort.

When Mum came home from work she asked why Baduk was in the living room. Dad sat her down on the sofa first then told her the whole story. She let out a long sigh. I thought she was discouraged because now we had cats as well but I was wrong. When she saw the cats in the box she softened and praised Dad me and especially Baduk—the hero of the day.

Baduk even got a special meal. After that he had to go back out to his kennel in the yard. Sorry Baduk. In our house Mum distinguishes very strictly between duty and privilege.

Friday, 6th January

In the morning Dad and I blocked up Baduk’s secret passage. He looked genuinely disappointed but we had no choice. Saving cats is admirable but sneaking out and spending the night outside is unacceptable. A timid owner might even feel betrayed wouldn’t he?

I warned him. If he starts roaming outside on his own again I’ll put him on a lead even in the yard. I told him very sternly that I too had learned to distinguish strictly between private life and service. He lowered his head miserable as if he understood.

Saturday, 7th January

After maths and English at Aunt Jeong-su’s Hee-jeong came to my house. On the way I told her about Baduk’s feat. She laughed and said he must be a distant cousin of the Jindo.

Dad made us fried rice for lunch. Apart from instant noodles it’s the dish he does best. He can make a few basic side dishes because Mum taught him but it’s more food for survival than food for flavour. Since Dad started running the household my nutrition has frankly become seriously unbalanced. Anyway. Because he’d studied fried rice for ages focusing on one single dish it was delicious. Hee-jeong said it was the best fried rice in the world. Dad revealed his big secret today. You have to use cold rice. What? Are there people out there making fried rice with hot rice?

After lunch the two of us went down to Dad’s workshop. He tried to yank the New Year’s Resolutions off the wall in a panic but it was too late. Hee-jeong already had a grin from ear to ear.

She loved my resolutions for the year. Especially No. 1. Be loyal to Hee-jeong. She looked very proud. And because she was happy my own heart felt like it was overflowing.

Dad played us an album. Time Out by Dave Brubeck. One track felt instantly familiar. ‘Take Five’. That lively piece the bungeo-ppang Hyung had introduced me to. Seeing Hee-jeong and me getting into it Dad told us the composer was Paul Desmond. He added that when Brubeck and Desmond work together it produces masterpieces but when they each release solo albums the music becomes strangely flat.

Perhaps the Brubeck and Desmond relationship was like the one between Hee-jeong and me.

Sunday, 8th January

The kittens are recovering quickly. Mum and Dad can’t decide whether to keep them or not. To be honest Dad and I aren’t really in a position to say let’s keep them since Mum is the one supporting Dad, me and Baduk. She said we’d postpone the decision until the cats were completely better.

Monday, 9th January

These days Dad does nothing but loaf about in his workshop. When Mum comes home and asks ‘So did you write well today?’ Dad replies ‘Yes I’m working hard.’ But when I go down and look he’s listening to music or reading. Of course according to Dad all of that counts as work.

Tuesday, 10th January

Hee-jeong and I talked a lot about the future. She’s torn. A general high school or an art school to prepare for fine art.

I said ‘With your grades couldn’t you even go to a science high school?’

She replied ‘My mum hates that kind of school.’

‘Why?’

‘She says if you’re going to study and then work in a company anyway it makes no difference. And because she worked for a long time she tells my brother and me that the best thing is to do what we like.’

‘But everyone wants to go to a science high school don’t they?’

‘Only strong students go there so the competition is even harder. So if I don’t want it she doesn’t want to send me.’

‘Really?’

‘Yes. And I don’t like it either. When I look at my cousins—good universities and they still struggle to find jobs. And when they finally do work all they say is they’re absolutely shattered every day.’

‘The bungeo-ppang Hyung said something like that too.’

‘I think like your dad doing what you really want is best. My dad also says one day when the time comes he’ll make a film.’

‘Seriously?’

‘Yeah. Apparently with a small camera you can film by yourself and edit on a computer. And you don’t necessarily need actors to make a film. I don’t know what he’ll shoot but I’m looking forward to it.’

‘Dong-wan says he wants to be a judge.’

‘Yeah that would suit him wouldn’t it?’

‘It would.’

‘I’m hesitating too. Maybe I’ll go to art school like my brother. He told me I’ve got talent and I should go to a studio.’ Hee-jeong’s face went a bit serious. ‘My mum and dad agree. But I don’t know if I truly want to make art.’

‘Why? You draw well.’

‘Other than art homework and that poetry-and-drawing exhibition I haven’t actually drawn that much. I don’t think I have that desire yet, to draw on my own or to express something. My brother thinks about drawing twenty-four hours a day.’

‘When did he start?’

‘Since the summer of Year 11, he’s gone to a studio. My parents weren’t against it but one teacher was—he said it was a shame because my brother was good in class. And you Byeok?’

‘Me? I don’t know yet.’

‘You have a very nice voice when you read.’

Today I decided. My dream is to become a voice actor.

Wednesday, 11th January

Whatever happens I will never become a nursery teacher. I thought I was going to die. All morning Hee-jeong and I ran after the little ones. They never get tired. Endurance of steel. I ought to find out what their families feed them at home. At this rate if I volunteer a few more days I’ll end up being volunteered myself.

When I got home the kittens had turned the living room into a complete mess. They’d ripped a sofa cushion open and the white stuffing was all over the floor like snow. I was already in pieces and then I completely finished myself off with cleaning.

Thursday, 12th January

In the end I got ill. I feel as if my whole body has been beaten up. Nursery teachers. Honestly I respect them. I still haven’t done the maths homework Aunt Jeong-su gave me. I’m just hoping I’ll be ill only until Saturday morning no longer.

Friday, 13th January

I called Aunt Jeong-su to say I wanted to miss tomorrow’s maths lesson. She said if I was that irresponsible what was the point of studying. Better to skip forever. When I told her it wasn’t that, but that I was ill she told me to stop acting and come tomorrow with the maths homework without fail. Thank goodness she didn’t have children. The person who would have been my cousin would’ve turned into a rebel from being nagged to death.

I spent the afternoon doing the maths homework. Strangely once I finished everything it felt like the illness disappeared. I’m afraid people will think I was only ill because of the maths homework.

Saturday, 14th January

After maths and English at Aunt Jeong-su’s Hee-jeong and I ate the dumpling soup she’d made. While we were eating I told her I was wondering what I’d become later.

‘Don’t think about what you want to become. Think about what you want to do.’

My uncle said something unusual. Something not very him. ‘Yes your aunt is right. If you chase becoming you get bored quickly. What matters is what you do Byeok.’

Hee-jeong said ‘Really? I don’t quite understand.’

My uncle was serious. ‘If you become a journalist just because you want to be a journalist you become nothing. What matters is what kind of journalist you are. You need an aim. What do you want to do as a journalist? There are loads of journalists. Even if you become one nothing changes. What matters is what you do.’

‘Dong-wan says his dream is to be the most impartial judge in the world.’

My aunt asked ‘That’s a dream. Well said. Byeok what do you want to do?’

‘Me… I don’t know yet.’

My uncle smiled ‘Then think calmly. You’re still in secondary school.’

Hee-jeong asked Aunt Jeong-su. ‘Miss when you were young did you have a dream?’

She replied ‘Of course. I dreamed of being a pilot flying a plane. But my family was poor. Even when I got into university on a scholarship I couldn’t go. I only entered university six years after finishing high school. And when I finally graduated I couldn’t get hired because of my age. I was already thirty. I had to be independent and earn a living so I ended up teaching maths to students. I had a dream but reality pushed me there. And yet today I’m happy.’

‘Then that’s fine.’ my uncle said.

‘And you sir?’

He answered ‘Me? My dream was to marry your Aunt Jeong-su.’

Hee-jeong asked astonished ‘Really?’

He said ‘Yes. At university she was the prettiest and the brightest in our school. For a whole term I followed her around calling her Noona. The seniors in my department wanted to date her but me—fresh back from the army—I ended up going out with her. Until graduation the seniors bullied me. I thought I was going to die honestly.’

‘Wow. You’re incredible.’

He glanced at my aunt then continued ‘Yep. They say the brave wins the beauty. The seniors liked her but they couldn’t even speak to her. Byeok you know it. Your aunt isn’t like everyone else. I wasn’t scared. I asked her straight out to go out with me.’

‘Madam is that true?’

‘Of course. Before he dated me your uncle only got Fs. But the moment we got together he got a scholarship until graduation. I told him. If you want to date me become a scholarship student. Then you’ll finish your studies and get a job. I told him I’d marry him if he became someone who could earn his own living. And would you believe it. The hopeless student became a scholarship student overnight. Then he got a job as soon as he graduated.’

‘In your family nobody objected to you marrying an older woman?’

He burst out laughing. ‘Object? Why? They were delighted! It’s just that I was a bit immature.’

Right. It’s decided. From today my dream is to marry Hee-jeong!

Sunday, 15th January

It’s Dad’s birthday. I gave him a Moleskine notebook. The one he’d wanted for ages. It’s just a notebook but it costs enough to make your eyes pop out. Still I told myself it must be essential for an author’s life so I gathered my courage. As expected Dad was delighted. He signed the notebook and then looked triumphant as if he were already a famous writer. Mum gave him a book by Genji Maruyama. The Resolution of a Novelist. The colour drained from Dad’s face. What kind of book is that?

Mr Sisina took the mother cat and the three kittens. He decided to raise all four at the factory where he works. We all got into Dad’s car and went to the factory. Of course Baduk—the number one hero of the rescue—came too. It was a kitchen furniture factory. And unlike what I’d secretly feared it was huge and very clean. Mr Sisina led us behind the factory and showed us a cat house he’d just made. It was bigger and cleaner than Baduk’s kennel. Dad and I felt reassured and handed over the four cats. Baduk looked very satisfied too.

Monday, 16th January

Genji Maruyama is truly an extraordinary writer. Just reading a few pages of The Resolution of a Novelist made it feel as if an electric current ran through my whole body. When I’ve finished it I’ll think again about my dream. It was like finding a lighthouse in the middle of the ocean.

Dad needs to understand Mum’s deeper intention in giving him this book. Even to me it looks like Dad is writing a novel but he’s terribly short on novelist’s resolution. And his sabbatical is already half over. What on earth is he thinking? Unless Dad thinks that since half still remains he has plenty of time.

Tuesday, 17th January

Dad keeps writing something in the workshop. When will a finished work finally appear? Is he still writing the story about the shadow thief? I’m curious. He looks like he’s found his resolution again.

Reading The Resolution of a Novelist I found a passage that could become the lamp in my heart. I think I was too impatient. If someone asks me from now on what my dream is I’ll quote this.

At that time I had already given up becoming a sailor. But I wasn’t dejected. Because I had made no effort to become a sailor it couldn’t be called a failure. In a way it also meant my possibilities were still wide—infinitely—open. If I discovered a path that felt right I could throw myself into it with all my strength. So until I find that path I decided to live quietly.

At last I feel a little calmer. I put The Resolution of a Novelist down and spent the evening reading Sherlock Holmes. This book is at my level and it’s exciting. Life has become pleasant again. I worried for nothing.

Wednesday, 18th January

I went to volunteer at the nursery. Now that I’m getting used to it it wasn’t very tiring today. The little ones listen well to what Hee-jeong and I say. Now I can see they really are adorable. That said I have no desire whatsoever to become a nursery teacher.

Lunar New Year is approaching. It’s the biggest season of the year. I’ll have to go and greet all the adults. Even the ones I never contact normally. If not now when would I? Of course it’s absolutely not because of the New Year money.

Thursday, 19th January

Wow! My Samchon is coming back to Korea. He’s Dad’s younger brother. Six years younger. He went to Beijing three years ago for work as an expatriate. Now he’s wrapped everything up and is returning to Seoul for good. The first year he came back to Seoul almost every month but since last year he’s been so swamped he even worked Saturdays and Sundays. It’s a bit of a shame. I should’ve visited him in Beijing at least once.

He really needs to get back before Lunar New Year. Of course not for the New Year money. It’s just that on a holiday you do it with family don’t you?

Friday, 20th January

It’s Grandfather’s birthday. I don’t understand why everyone’s birthdays in our family are bunched up in winter. To show my respect I gave him a set of handkerchiefs. Since he washes his hands often it’s the most useful gift.

Happy birthday Grandfather. Please stay healthy always.

Saturday, 21st January

My Samchon came back. As soon as I finished studying at Aunt Jeong-su’s I ran to Grandfather’s. When he saw me my Samchon held out his hand to shake mine. Wow. He really is different. I no longer like being patted on the head. I’m a man who uses skincare that says For Men and HOMME.

Even though it isn’t Lunar New Year yet he’d already given me a thick envelope of pocket money. He said ‘Here. For you.’

He’ll stay at Grandfather’s for a while until he finds a place. When Grandmother asked if he didn’t have any shipped belongings from China he said no. My Samchon always travels with a single bag. A real tough guy. Perfect edition. Let the one who hit Mr Sisina show his face.

Sunday, 22nd January

Even during the Lunar New Year holidays Dad doesn’t come out of the workshop. It must be because of The Resolution of a Novelist Mum gave him. If a novelist didn’t have to write novels it would be a fairly comfortable job. Get up drink coffee listen to music read go for walks loaf about. But there’s one huge problem. You have to write. And that isn’t a question of resolution. It’s hard.

In the evening I went down to tell him to come and eat. He was working without even noticing I was there. I can’t wait to see what kind of work his resolution gives birth to.

Monday, 23rd January (Lunar New Year)

It’s Lunar New Year. Early in the morning we did the ancestral rite at Grandfather’s then made our bows. Naturally I also collected a handsome amount of New Year money. My Samchon had already given me an envelope a few days ago but today he gave me money again. ‘That was that and this is this.’ he said. Since Aunt Jeong-su went to her in-laws with her husband I’ll go and greet her tomorrow.

I had rice-cake soup for breakfast then went to Hee-jeong’s to make my bows. Her parents said I did my greetings very well and they gave me generous New Year money. Her dad told me to buy something nice with Hee-jeong and have fun. He added that enjoying yourself properly is more important than only working. Inside, I replied, Father-in-law don’t worry. I’m extremely confident when it comes to having fun. But there’s decorum and timing. I couldn’t say it out loud could I?

Hee-jeong’s mum said ‘Our Byeok, this year too get on well with Hee-jeong.’ That means she already sees me as a future son-in-law doesn’t it?

Hee-jeong and I went to my grandparents’ to make our bows. Hee-jeong received New Year money from my grandfather, my grandmother, my mother, my father and my Samchon. The two of us felt rich enough to buy a small flat. We arranged to go out together tomorrow morning.

I finished Aunt Jeong-su’s maths homework in advance. I didn’t want to worry about homework during our date.

Tuesday, 24th January

While Dad was making breakfast, Mum told him the travel agency would probably need to hire two or three more employees soon. But I think instead of hiring it would be better to hire Dad. Dad already understands Mum perfectly as a boss. From her expression he knows what to do. From her outfit he knows her mood. From her tone he can instantly decide whether to trigger the alarm. But I don’t know how the agency employees would feel about that.

As soon as I finished eating I went to Hee-jeong’s. Since I had a lot of pocket money in my pocket I dressed accordingly. I wore my favourite white trousers and a black sweater. Over that a wool coat and I wrapped a scarf around my neck. Even I thought I looked fairly classy.

Hee-jeong’s mum opened the door and said ‘Oh my goodness Byeok, you look elegant!’ Hee-jeong wore jeans and a white sweater with a red duffle coat over the top. And with the scarf I’d given her she wasn’t merely cute. She was an angel. Her mum told us to be careful of weird people. We answered very loudly. ‘Yes!’

Kyobo Book Centre was open even during the holiday and it made me feel a bit sorry for the employees working on a public holiday. While we were looking at books Hee-jeong gave me Letters to a Young Novelist by Mario Vargas Llosa. A letter written by a Nobel Prize winner for me. Nobody in the world needs to know how much my heart overflowed. Well. Nobody needs to know. It’s enough that Hee-jeong and I know.

Wednesday, 25th January

Morning. Nursery volunteering. Afternoon. Holiday homework. That was my day. I don’t understand why a young novelist needs holiday homework.

Thursday, 26th January

Every night I fall asleep hugging Letters to a Young Novelist Hee-jeong’s gift. It feels too precious. I haven’t even opened the first page.

Friday, 27th January

Letters to a Young Novelist has disappeared. I searched my room top to bottom like I was hunting fleas but I couldn’t find it.

Alert.

Alert.

Alert.

Saturday, 28th January

At breakfast Dad handed me the book saying he’d read it and it was very good. I shouted ‘Dad! Do you know how long I looked for that?!’ Dad replied ‘Oh did you?’ as if it were nothing. I checked to see whether the book was damaged. And then I saw red broth stains all over it. When I asked what they were he said he’d been reading while eating instant noodles and some broth had splashed. Aaah.

As soon as I finished maths and English at Aunt Jeong-su’s I ran to Kyobo. But they were out of stock. My whole body started to shake. The older sister at the counter told me there was one copy left at Kyobo in Gwanghwamun. I sprinted there. While I was running my heart hammered convinced someone would buy it before I arrived. Luckily it was still there. Nobody had taken it. I bought it hugged it tightly and went home.

I put the two books on my bed and thought very seriously for a long time. Which one would I love more? In the end I hugged the one stained with noodle broth. The clean one I’d just bought at Gwanghwamun I gave to Dad. Dad hugged me and thanked me.

In my head I told him. Dad finish the novel you’re writing quickly and show it to me.

Sunday, 29th January

Without realising it tomorrow is already the first day back. I don’t understand why between the winter holidays and the spring holidays we have to go back to school. There are hardly any real lessons. Can’t we just remain on holiday?

Monday, 30th January

Back to school. During study period I took out the book Hee-jeong gave me and read it. Dong-wan and Jong-gu asked what it was but instead of answering I just gave a crooked little smile.

Tuesday, 31st January

I finished the book Hee-jeong gave me—the one Dad splashed with noodle broth—Letters to a Young Novelist by Mario Vargas Llosa. From today my dream is clear. I will be a novelist. That dream will never change again. Today I engraved my writer’s resolution into myself.

- Resolution of the Writer Heo Byeok -

1. I will nurture an obsession inside me.
2. I will go to the cinema and bookshops with it and we will never part.
3. I will obey it faithfully like an inner voice.